'Cry without Weeping, Talk without Speaking, Scream without Raising Your Voice...'

A new 2-year plan...

2010-12-15T23:31:00.002+08:00

2012... time for something big.. =)

Stay tuned for more updates...

It's been a while...

2010-08-29T17:12:00.004+08:00

It's been 5 years since my last entry.. I wonder if anyone's still having this site 'book-marked'.. I guess not..

Anyhow, it's been a wonderful and busy 5 years.. which might explain why I hadn't been blogging. .=)

Doesn't mean that time now is down and free for me.. just that I thought it might be apt to re-live this blog.. and see what else I could start blogging about..

Guess it's impt to always continue reflecting abt life.. seeking inspiration.. and being an inspiration...

Let's see how long I can last this time...

Keeping the Faith... =)

'Nobody gives a damn when I'm Miserable, so I might as well be Happy!!'

2005-06-06T23:33:00.000+08:00

That's gonna be my quote for a long time to come man... speaks for itself...

'Seems to me You have been Enjoying your Time of Your Life.. I'm Glad I can finally be History.. and I Hope I can finally start Moving On..'

all my bags are packed up, I'm ready to go...

2005-02-28T01:52:00.000+08:00

What a way to end of the month, than having to take a flight to a new land for overseas trg.. on the 1st of a new month...

Reality check.. from the long list of resolutions and to-dos.. I seem to have fulfill little... having only gotten my power pleasure craft licence.. gaining up on my savings though.. but rest pretty much where I started off from...

Still drinking like a fish at times.. had to agree when one of my new found pal exclaim that, 'don't drink, then do what?'.. imagine a couple of dudes trying to find some activity on a saturday night, only to be able to think of things revolving ard alcohol... (we end up catching 'Assault on precinct 13'.. not really that nice with a jammed story line I would say, it's afterall revolving ard a night of activity)

Wondering how it would be like over at India this time tmw man... probably engaged in the 10 hours at least coach ride to the trg area... hopefully can grab some sleep during then...

Yet another boring weekend spent largely at home... can't even be bothered to leave house and got my sister to help me do my shopping for India necessities... sigh... am I evolving back into a loner?

Women are from Venus... sometimes, I seriously can't understand them... what are they really thinking... and what do they really want...

Oh well... 19 days or so away from home.. by the time I come back, gonna have wasted March as well... Shit... 1/4 of the year pass... doubt I would have much progress in my resolutions and to-dos.. diving's postponed all the way till ard April I guess... I just hope my new posting would be firmed by the week I touch down... Give me something worthy to do!!!

Btw, who's Phenol? Been leaving comments on my post, but ain't responding to my attempts to identify... Who are you my friend?

See ya folks in 19 days time...

bye... still missing you...

WTSHNN...

2005-01-31T19:04:00.000+08:00

"What can I give back to God
For the blessings he's poured out on me
I'll lift high the cup of salvation
A toast to God

I'll pray in the name of God
I'll complete what I promised God I'll do
And I'll do it together with his people"
- Bono, before singing WTSHNN, Elevation 2001, Boston

Right Here Right Now...

2005-01-19T01:54:00.000+08:00

What a day it has been... one of the busier ones for the break... at least it was plenty of actions going on ard... Went to the pool to complete 30 laps in under 45mins... must say that it was a feat considering that I retired from the swimming scene for quite a while.. must do under 40mins then can go for the Singapore Biathlon liao... anyone keen to join me?

What was supposed to be just a short meet up session with a diver friend of mine, plus servicing my reg and BCD, turned up to be a catching up session with my dive instructor, Andrew.. he was supposed to be away at Manado, but came back for a while before flying off next month... Had a long chat with him.. plus booze of course... 4 bottles of heniken to be exact... was talking abt his venture to Manado and how he was finally having his dreams coming true.. happy for you boss.. hopefully I can follow u this coming CNY... need to complete my DM as well as experience the simple yet happy lifestyle over there man... "Make a decision, stick with it... Make a mistake, learn from it..." was one of the notable quotes he mentioned... must say I really learnt a lot from him during my diving days man.. from making diving as a passion... to learning the ways to lead a colourful life... You da man boss... So when's the next Hawaiian Five-O man? Plus the stupid card game with the pee cards and your peeping trump card else u won't play? Miss those days man....

Next was the power pleasure craft diving licence lesson... must say that I really learnt quite a bit from this course I signed up.. at least I'm more aware of the islands, beacons, light houses, buoys around the island now... so next time if I'm ever out at sea.. I won't be lost... can even rent a yacht next time to go out to sea... but I can only carry 12 people lah.. so who's interested?? Can make it into a Christmas or New Year countdown plan... or even someone's birthday man... =) I dun mind loaning my services as well.. charge by the minutes though...

More great activities coming up for the rest of the week... (ok guys still hard @ work.. dun be jealous k? You all say I deserve it mah.... just waiting for S1 to call me to head back to work man... a part of me still yearning for that... serious...) Tennis, Sentosa, park connector blading, diving, touch, powercraft driving... plus a dim sum session coming up for the next 5 days... sometimes I'm not sure whether it's singlehood or just free time @ hand... just hope I won't be addicted to this...

More funny jokes to share...

The Engineer Joke:

'There are three engineers in a car; an electrical
engineer, a chemical engineer and a Microsoft
engineer. Suddenly the car just stops by the side of
the road, and the three engineer look at each other
wondering what could be wrong.

The electrical engineer suggests stripping down the
electronics of the car and trying to trace where a
fault might have occurred. The chemical engineer, not
knowing much about cars, suggests that maybe the fuel
is becoming emulsified and getting blocked somewhere.

Then, the Microsoft engineer, not knowing much about
anything, comes up with a suggestion, "Why don't we
close all the windows, get out, get back in, open the
windows again, and maybe it'll work!?"'

'How many Microsoft programers does it take to make Windows a good operating system?

More.'

Be a Wise man... Grab a MAC today...

"A part of me still yearns for you...
A part of me still wants to be close to you...
But I guess you should know, this time we have come too far...
Too far such that I really need to know from you...
Do you still feel the same for me too...
I don't know how to reassure you, that things are pretty much still the same as before...
Still the same as where we first left off...
Still the old me... still the old us... but I hope would be a new you...
A new you whom feels so right, when you are with me once again...
I'm still missing ya..."

The Art of creating Strength...

2005-01-17T23:14:00.000+08:00

Just came back from a 5km run.. clocked a rather reasonable timing, at least was under the target I set before I attempted.. My ultimate timing would be under 20mins... averaging of 4mins per km... Achievable? I will let u know in 2 months' time... that's the target period I'm aiming @...

Anyway, back to my blog title today.. was running and running, till the point whereby I just felt like giving up.. I guess everyone would feel the same, esp after a period of hibernation, mine's since last wed's run.. with my neck giving me some sharp pain... plus my legs unwilling to raise an inch higher and further, I decided to try what my good old buddy said the other time, perhaps channeling all the sorrows and miseries that's plaguing your life now into strength, added strength and 'force/psycho' yourself to do better... not sure if it works, but at least I did the run under the timing I set.. These days it seemed, I'm pushing harder for all my runs.. Also, conditioning myself to stop using vulgarities when the going gets tough.. instead, nowadays I'm getting the much needed inspiration from who else, but God.. =) Starting my Navy SEALS training regime now.. hopefully I would survive and give my Ranger course one more shot this year... btw, don't be deter by the words 'Navy SEALS'.. I'm starting from an amatuer condition.. so everything is within the comfort zone.. just hope 18 weeks later (the whole trg program span 18 weeks) I would be a different man.. heh heh... at least fitter than now! =)

Must say nights are really a nice time to run at ECP, and there ain't much people running to begin with.. but lack the extra motivation upon being challenged lah... but then again, there's always the sights of couples strolling along, or a few amatuer bladers picking their skills up... 'next time when I'm attached again, u bet my arse I would bring my girl to stroll often along ECP man, and talk abt the dreams, aspirations, hopes the future holds for the both of us'.. anyway, running @ night also gives me the excuse to sleep in in the morning lah.. esp when I'm in 'cold storage' now (a term my dad kept asking if I was in... ha ha ha.. I'm not k)

Before I check out of here... some funny shit I picked up from a website... Sorry WINDOWS users...

"A stupid man never learns from his mistakes.
A smart man always learns from his mistakes.
A wise man learns from other peoples mistakes.

. . and buys a Mac."

"There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed a desire to become a "great" writer.
When asked to define "great", he said "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, wail, howl in pain, desperation and anger!"

He now works for Microsoft writing error messages."

I really love the next one

A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said 'WHERE AM I?' in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said 'YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER.' The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it.

"I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

Narf Said.. MAC RULES!

"And so, contact has been made again,
But would it be wise if I reciprocate?
I'm not sure this time, caused I have always choosen the obvious,
This time, perhaps, I'll try the alternative
And perhaps, just perhaps again, you would know how much I mean to you"

"Nobody has to be a hero, it just sometimes turn out that way."
- To the men and women that are coming back home from the tidal waves' relief efforts, I salute all of you...

Purpose in Life...

2005-01-15T04:23:00.000+08:00

A burning question.. which after this post will still continue to burn in me...

'What's my Purpose in Life?'..

What do you think is yours?

This burning question continues to haunt me... even at 4am in the morning... Its Answer.. only time will tell.. perhaps on my death bed I would then be capable of offering its best answer...

But seriously, I really hope not... cos I still wanna be able to make a difference.. a difference in my life and in the lives of those around me... a difference in this purpose of life...

First stop.. I think I shall stop all acts of procrastinations... and put my planned plans into actions...

Be with me My Lord and My God.. Walk by my side..

Retrenchment... Unemployment...

2005-01-13T22:23:00.000+08:00

Now, I'm seriously starting to understand how it feels to be retrenched or unemployed.. it sucks, big time.. imagine having to rot @ home having nothing to do, except staring @ a 15 inch monitor almost all day long (I ain't doing my LASIK ops a favour here man...) Only good thing? I'm still being paid... paid to slack.. sorry folks, not really wanting to waste your income taxes here... but, manpower's damn sucky (Matthias, u reading this? Better make sure u implement some changes when u become S1 man..).. haven't managed to find another posting for me... I'm getting so desperate here, I don't really mind any tasking... send me to India.. Aceh... Afghanistan... Iraq... ANYWHERE!!! I just don't wanna slack... at least not at this time.. my idiotic colleague was joking that if only I was attached now.. think abt the hours I can spend spending time with her... I say talk abt irony @ its best...

Tmw's the last day of work for the week.. hopefully will hear of something.. at least something, somewhere.. for next week...

Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?

iSeek...

2005-01-12T22:53:00.000+08:00

First stop: www.apple.com ... log on and be blown away by the new apps and hardware abt to hit our stores soon...

My Favs got to be the Mini Mac, iLife '05 and iPod Shuffle... (think it's almost everything Mr Jobs intro today man..) Anyone willing to sponsor my pursuit into techno savvy stuff? Heh heh... Anyway, Mac OS X: Tiger's abt to hit the market before June '05 as well... better still, maybe our fantastic crew @ Apple can come out with Powerbook G5... so purchasing that would encompass almost all the cool apps abt to be in the market... Budgeting time man...

Anyway, today spells Day 3 without a posting since Monday and 6 weeks since I handed over my appointment to my under-study... still, no one has an answer to my all important question since the start of the year... "Where am I going to be posted next?" My S1 has no clue... my ex-CO thought I was going to School after all.. School MPO says CO School don't know and feels that it ain't wise for me to go over due to the estab change.. my ex-OC is trying to hlep me find out more posting.. my current CO and OC are trying hard to 'get rid' of me as well.. sigh... 'where do I go from here??'

I need some answers man... I need answers...

'Ask, and you shall be given.. Seek, and you shall find... Knock, and the door shall be opened for you...'

100 Years

2005-01-08T01:34:00.000+08:00

Was trying this 'What song you are most associated with' and got linked with 100 years by Five for Fighting... kinda meaningful so for those whom curious.. just type the song name and band into google or yahoo and check out the song...

Anyway, just received my 'official' posting... I'm heading back where I have always wanted to go... AISL (Armoured Infantry Section Leader) Course Commander at School.. heh heh... the talk abt demoting the post to a warrent ain't gonna be in effect anytime soon.. so the post's still 'mine'.. however, was initially short-listed to go Aceh for the reflief missions (which of course would have been my top priority choice).. but it's been filled eventually and my bosses think I should secure my primary posting as a course commander first... so school's where I'm heading next monday, hopefully... but then again, things ain't really firmed till I'm sitting on my desk I should say... there's this joke circulating that unless u are at ur post for a good 2 months.. then it's ur post... ha ha... anyway, wait for my good news next week lah.. or see me scream online again... anyway, my Bde Comdr was telling me that if he still sees me free when he's back from India, he got a good posting at Bde.. wonder if it's NDP.. hmmm... might be interesting as well... see how lah... '2 months'... so out of the 4 bad things for Dec 04.. 3 just got better... What abt the last one?? Sigh... oh well... as long as She's truly HAPPY!!

Anyway, unhappy things aside, some updates on my resolutions which I can be damn proud of for now... managed to keep clean from alcohol today even though it was my CO COC (Change of Command).. Sir, you have been truly a great CO and leader.. had an enjoyable time under ur charge.. will always bear the fond memories of ARR... Wallaby... Swimming... Thank You Sir!!! Anyway, with that, I'm still alcohol clean 7 days into jan.. and I never drink drive... ha ha...

Also, found my lobangs for my powercraft licence... biathlons/marathons to take part... musical instrument to learn... that's like a few of the resolutions i have got 'settled' so far... anyway, forgot to add one more resolution.. less swearing.. as in usage of vulgarities, ha ha ha... must be good Catholic mah... still got more resolutions to be settled.. esp when the diving season opens... when my dad finally decides to purchase the new car...when U2 release their world tour details... blah blah blah... somehow, the year's starting great.. or should i say not too bad lah, so will only get better and better...

"Hey 15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live"

05's gonna be a rocking year for me... at least I'll make sure of that...

Day 4 into 2005

2005-01-04T21:33:00.000+08:00

It's never easy when u haven't been blogging for a while when u decided to start with ur next post... u always wondered if u shld recap what u have went thru the past few days or.. talk abt what's in line for the next few... and by the time u decide, u just can't very much be bothered to pen down anything... talk abt procrastination at its best (remember my procrastination post the last time ard? ha ha)

Well, new year was spent with lots of booze... in the company of good buddies.. as well as an excellent band... liveband shall i add, EIC that is.. if they are ushering New Year for 2006, u bet my ass I'll be going down to Wala Wala again... but u can bet my ass off that i won't be trying any of the funny stuff we tried that night, ever again... and no, it's nothing illegal... ha ha..

Been 4 days into the new year.. and what have I done so far? ha ha.. been sick in my bed the past 2 days that is... probably after the 200m worth of butterfly that I was 'forced' to swim for my unit... shack man.. but at least I completed and helped get some points... not sure if it's enuff to win anything though... anyway, I also posting out mah.. ha ha... Also, hopefully with this week's of leave, can catch up with friends whom I haven't seen or heard for a long time since... plus running some errants of my own.. before I get all busy with my new posting (Haven't heard anything abt it anyway, yet..)

Been keeping in touch with the relief efforts that we are giving to the tsunami-hit countries, must say that how badly I wished I was doing something there instead of staying at home and 'enjoying' my leave... I would have gladly volunteered anytime man.. one of my friend just left with the 2nd LST today.. all the best dude, and do ur best there man... This tragedy really brought a lot of us to our senses that life is truly that fragile.. at least to me... so here I am, making a whole list of resolutions and must dos for the year of 2005.. Life's short, at least if anything, I would know I have tried living it to the fullest...

In no preferred orders..

1) Refurnish my Room
2) Get my PowerCraft Licence
3) Attend a U2 concert anywhere in the world
4) Learn a new musical instrument (acoustic guitar or piano)
5) Dive again and get my DM
6) Learn to play Golf
7) Learn at least 1 type of dance
8) To have at least 10 grand or more in my savings by year end
9) Abstain from alcohol for the month of Jan and to cut down on intake for the rest of the year
10) Test drive a car
11) Maintain fitness level (IPPT Gold and SOC under 9:00)
12) Learn to fault-find and maintain a car
13) Participate in a Marathon
14) Participate in a Biathlon/Triathlon
15) Write a Mission statement for My Life
16) Make a worthy charity contribution every month
17) Smile More
18) Give people more chances
19) Get my own Fishing Rod
20) Get a Digital camera
21) Learn Sign language
22) No Drink Driving
23) No Unnecessary Speeding
24) Open up my Social Circle
25) Be a Good Catholic and to grow stronger in my Faith and Walk with God...

So what's your resolutions? Made any yet? Let's see how many can I fufill and keep by for 2005.. as far as I know, I'm still making more resolutions...

Cowabunga to 2005!!!

Auld Lang Syne...

2004-12-31T18:21:00.000+08:00

What better time to include a blog entry, than the end of the year... Yes.. the last day of the year... ha ha ha...

Anyway, think gonna end the year on a good note afterall (note: it's good note.. not best note or high note..) Remember the 4 things that screwed up in 2004 for me? Ha ha... 2 just got better... God has not forgotten us.. and He never will...

1) Made peace with my dad... finally... happened when I was just abt to go back to camp when he made his move of acceptance of my apology by passing me the car keys... car aside... guess with this ordeal, it showed the both of us how much we matter to each other.. for all the years Dad, I love ya...

2) My platoon gave me a fond and memorable farewell... was grabbed by a couple of my guys to be 'lap-danced' by some dancer employed for entertainment during our Bn Annivesary Dinner... was followed by a 'taing' toast by some of them and it ended with the whole platoon saluting me back at the coyline... To anyone from Pl 5, thanks for all the good and bad times we shared during this whole year.. thanks for all the fond memories along the way, as well as the lessons we taught each other... sorry for the times when I failed to be whom you all wanted me to be... just want all of you to know that you guys have given me a fond, memorable and enriching PC tour, any PC would have wanted... do continue to keep the morale high.. and the coy flag flying high... all the best for 2005.. esp ATEC... Redcon 1 shouldn't be a prob for you guys in Stage 1.. thrive to excel in Stage 2, even though it's in Singapore... Thru' Thick & Thin Dudes!!!

Well... last post for the year perhaps, as I'm heading off for some good times with my long time buddies (yeah, no girls.. sad right?)

For the other 2 screwed up incidents.. just hope 2005 brings new hope for me... and for her... like I said.. as long as you are genuinely happy...

Auld Lang Syne my friends and God Bless for the new year!

Life's too short... 'Walk On... Leave it behind..'

2004-12-17T19:53:00.000+08:00

Walk On
And love is not the easy thing
The only baggage you can bring...
And love is not the easy thing....
The only baggage you can bring
Is all that you can't leave behind

And if the darkness is to keep us apart
And if the daylight feels like it's a long way off
And if your glass heart should crack
And for a second you turn back
Oh no, be strong

Walk on, walk on
What you got they can’t steal it
No they can’t even feel it
Walk on, walk on...
Stay safe tonight

You're packing a suitcase for a place none of us has been
A place that has to be believed to be seen
You could have flown away
A singing bird in an open cage
Who will only fly, only fly for freedom

Walk on, walk on
What you've got they can't deny it
Can’t sell it, can’t buy it
Walk on, walk on
Stay safe tonight

And I know it aches
And your heart it breaks
And you can only take so much
Walk on, walk on

Home… hard to know what it is if you’ve never had one
Home… I can’t say where it is but I know I'm going home
That's where the hurt is

I know it aches
How your heart it breaks
And you can only take so much
Walk on, walk on

Leave it behind
You've got to leave it behind
All that you fashion
All that you make
All that you build
All that you break
All that you measure
All that you steal
All this you can leave behind
All that you reason
All that you sense
All that you speak
All you dress up
All that you scheme…

How to not get your ass kicked by the police...

2004-12-13T13:47:00.000+08:00

Was reading my bro's blog and he's going to come out with 101 tricks to siam road block or to breeze thru them...

Here's my version, lifted off Chris Rock's show:

1) Obey the Law (don't drink and drive.. ha ha..)

2) Use common sense (don't freaking have a half drank bottle of Tiger in ur cup holder)

3) Stop immediately (you can't outwin a TP with sirens on and chasing you.. at least not in Singapore)

4) Turn that shit off (you won't want a TP to question u on top of his voice with your 'Punk Rock' being blasted thru your car stereo

5) Be polite (don't question the TP 'What the F*** you want?'

6) Shut the Fuck up... esp when u are travelling with a friend that can't shut up..

7) Get a white friend aka travel with a 'hongkie'.. not a 'brother'... ha ha..

8) Don't ride with a mad woman... speaks for itself...

Don't Drink and Drive... Drive when you have stopped drinking...

Seasons Greetings...

Procrastination...

2004-12-12T20:52:00.000+08:00

Came before a damn crude quote which I dun really mind sharing here for those with an open mind.. rated M-18.. 'Procrastination is just like Masturbation... In the end, you are just screwing yourself' ha ha ha... Funny why I started to talk abt procrastination eh? Cos I'm... and am doing...

It's like D minus 12 days to Christmas eve... and I'm still not done with my shopping.. or shld I put it that I have not even started... S***... wonder whether will be able to squeeze time off as well, since I'm gonna be busy conducting lessons the next 2 weeks... only left 1 weekend to do last minute (not literally) shopping...

Anyway, the only shopping I have done so far might just be the purchase of my brand new Mit Lancer... ha ha.. had a talk with my dad and he's settling it for me... just have to come out with the downpayment.. aiming to clear at least 10 grand of it plus with the scrapping of my dad's car.. should be left with slightly less than 30 grand to settle with monthly installments... keeping my fingers crossed to get it before CNY next year... =)

Well, for those following my re-born romance as per hyped up since last weekend.. nothing much happened, really... just went out for meal and shopping.. but never really do much, not even talking abt us as well.. it all seems so... erhm.. friendly.. ha ha... maybe we just need time lah... what's more, she's been hanging out for drinks with friends lately, so definitely would be able to meet up with more guys... more choices... what am I to her? sigh... don't really wanna 'force' myself to being a spare as well... keeping my options open as well.. but.. what options?? ha ha ha...

Just came upon this song again lately... it's in a Jap movie (abt rescue divers) that's apparently quite good as well... Umizaru...

Open Arms - Journey

Lying beside you, here in the dark
Feeling your heart beat with mine
Softly you whisper, you're so sincere
How could our love be so blind
We sailed on together
We drifted apart
And here you are by my side

So now I come to you, with open arms
Nothing to hide, believe what I say
So here I am with open arms
Hoping you'll see what your love means to me
Open arms

Living without you, living alone
This empty house seems so cold
Wanting to hold you, wanting you near
How much I wanted you home

But now that you've come back
Turned night into day
I need you to stay.

Talk abt dejavu man... JQMM? ha ha ha.. better not man... gonna into serious work and serious shopping this next 2 weeks man...

Christmas Wish List... (Somebody pls read this!!):
1) Something for my new car.. (Body kit packages, new sports rim, modified stereo surround sound system that's iPod compatible are all welcome... ha ha ha...)
2) Crumpler Laptop bag...
3) Nokia N-gage QD
4) CSI Season 3 DVD region code 3
5) 4.0 mega pixel digi cam with underwater housing
6) Nice polo tees, t-shirts
7) Casual sneakers for going out
8) Someone to pay for my U2 concert tickets and air tickets
9) Someone to pay for ALL my expenses for the next year
10) Da One.. Da Only... (and no, I'm not desperate... yet)

Tick Tick Tick....

New Year Resolutions...

2004-12-05T17:45:00.000+08:00

Well, in a bit to find back myself... set myself the aim of writing down any goals, resolutions, blah blah blah whenever they come to my mind... so here it is.. my current list...

1) Get my own Car (by mid 2005)
2) Get my Dive Master (by mid 2005.. 20 plus more dives to go)
3) Start saving regularly, in greater amounts (start of 2005)
4) Learn to cook (start of 2005)
5) In-Depth Graphics Designing (need to put my mac to good use.. plus all the photoshop shit I have installed inside.. start of 2005)
6) Blade better (gonna start venturing into more zai t-stops... learn how to do crossovers... plus reverse blading..)
7) Start a fitness regime, a regular one with running, swimming and gyming, to tone up my physique (start of 2005)
8) Open up my social circle... I want to meet people from ALL walks of life (start of 2005)
9) Do up my personal hive... need to be more organised and neater, else I'll end up losing more things again.. (start of 2005 with spring cleaning lining up)
10) Be more organised and less forgetful... shit, signs of getting old...

Akan Datang.. more is on its way...

Counting down to the end of the year or the start of the new year..

2004-12-05T13:30:00.000+08:00

So... 2004 is coming to an end.. What have you done so far? What have you achieved? What have you gained? What have you lost? What have you to regret? Most importantly, what/where/how/who do you see yourself in 1 year's time, 2 years' time... 5 years' time? At 24.. at with an estimated 80 yrs old expectancy... I have 'wasted' more than 1/4 of my life.. another 1/4 would be spent in my old age... this next 20 yrs would be like the 'Time' of my life perhaps... Funny thing is I have been asking my best buddies this question.. but I can't seem to be able to answer it myself... My life just seemed so routine.. so mundane... every next day seems so aimless, objectiveless, pointless... it seems like what I have built up over the past 11 months are crumbling over... it seems all were not worthwhile... 'I want to run.. I want to hide.. I want to tear down the walls that hold me inside...' Suggestions anyone? Let's see if I can make a difference within the next 26 days... perhaps 2005 would be the turning point in my life.... perhaps perhaps....

Later...

Funny Things about Singaporeans

2004-11-28T18:46:00.000+08:00

Lifted off a forum... Some of it are so true...

1. Thanks to SMS, you have an extra large thumb.

2. Tks 2 SMS, u oso dun no how 2 spel anymor.

3. You pat bus seats and even MRT seats to cool them before you sit down.

4. At lunch, you start discussing what to eat for dinner.

5. Your wedding photos include shots of you dressed up like Louis XIV, Michael Jackson, or Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet in Titanic.

6. When speaking to foreigners, you somehow feel a need to adopt an accent.

7. You won't raise your voice to protest policies, but you'll raise your fists to whack someone over Hello Kitty.

8. You're forever talking about businesses you want to set up but will probably never get around to starting.

9. You don't know 3/4 of the people attending your wedding.

10. You separate food into 2 basic groups: 'heaty' and 'cooling'.

11. You think that what makes you 'married' is not the legal registration but whether you've thrown a 12 course dinner.

12. You marry for the real estate breaks.

13. You have kids for the tax advantages.

14. You move to where you want your child to go to school.

15. You force your children to take Speech & Drama classes, but pray they won't wind up in Arts later on.

16. You suddenly realize you're very interested in biotech - just like you suddenly realized three years ago that you were very interested in e-commerce, and before that, engineering, and before that, medicine and law.

17. You think people are inconsiderate when they don't leave their table immediately after eating at the food court but think you have every right to take 25 bites to finish the last red bean in your ice kachang.

18. You find it impossible to make suggestions without drawing a fishbone chart first!

19. If you're a guy, whenever you get together with your guy friends, you invariably trade army stories.

20. You think the most important sporting event in Singapore this year was David Beckham switching from Manchester United to Real Madrid.

21. You've eaten more times at the Esplanade than you've actually seen shows there.

22. You need campaigns to tell you how to be courteous, to flush toilets, have se*, etc.

23. You always feel oddly hungry at 11 pm, and are willing to drive to far away places for supper.

24. You work at McDonald's when you're old rather than young.

25. You'll gladly spend $50,000 on a car, but will go to great lengths to save a few bucks on ERP charges or even a few cents on a parking coupon.

26. If you're pregnant, you have the strange ability to make people on the MRT fall asleep instantly.

27. You've started referring to foreign employees as 'talent' instead of 'expatriates'.

28. At the dinner table, you're always discussing which other food places serve better versions of what you're eating.

29. You copy down license plate numbers of cars involved in accidents.

30. You think your boyfriend doesn't really love you unless he gives you part of his liver.

31. You pronounce the letter 'R' as 'ah-rer' and the letter 'H' as 'haytch'.

32. No matter how old you are, you keep associating people with their secondary schools. (Alternative: No matter how old you are, you secretly need to know what other people got for their PSLE, O levels and A levels.)

33. You believe that you can generate 'creativity' through rules and committees.

34. You 'chope' a seat by placing a packet of tissues on the chair.

35. You diligently track the whereabouts of your favourite hawkers, i.e. you know that the famous Tiong Bahru Bao is now in Jurong, the famous Outram Char Kuay Teow is now in Hong Lim Centre and the famous Lau Hock Kien Hokkien mee from the old Lau Pa Sat is now at Beach Road.

36. You think we're living in a modern, sophisticated country even when our leaders still insist on wearing their school uniforms.

I still haven't found what I've been looking for...

2004-11-28T01:40:00.000+08:00

Damn... Just when I wanted to frame up my baptism cert, I can't find it... s*** man... not sure where the h*** I left it... might had even accidentally thrown it away, S*** x 10 man... room's really in a mess... need to do some area-cleaning soon... real soon... hopefully the cert will pop out from somewhere... well, God do make miracles sometimes.. else would have to go back church to see if I can get a replacement or something.. sad...

Had an eventful sat with my cousin's church wedding taking centre spot.. went to town with Adrian after church... was saying that it's been a long time since we were at orchard on a saturday.. probably it's becos of the unattached status, no reasons to be out on a sat night at orchard, with the huge amount of human traffic and stuff...

Guess it's gonna be Christmas shopping soon for me to get some gifts for my friends... but for my dear stalkers out there.. here's my almost, i said almost, impossible wish list for Christmas and the New Year..

- Mitsubishi Lancer 1.6 Sports Manual or Hyundai 2.0 Tuscon Manual or Toyota Rav4 2.4 Manual or Mazda 3 1.6
- Apple G5 20' iMac w Superdrive
- Apple G5 15' w Superdrive Powerbook (this is not even on the designing table.. i just thought of it... )
- U2 concert tickets plus plane and accom fully paid for
- Crumpler laptop bag for 15' laptop
- Nokia N-gage QD w/o plan
- A new set of shirt, pants, belt, tie and leather black shoes for Christmas and New Year
- A few sets of nice polo tees, t-shirts and a pair of good matching sneakers with blue jeans (i've been freaking wearing the same s*** the whole year...)
- U2 Digital Music Box Set from iTunes online music store (which is still not legalised in Singapore.. WTF???)
- Digital Camera (at least 4Mega Pixel w underwater housing available)
- CSI Season 3 DVDs
- Find back my baptism cert
- Spend more time with my family, and make the family much much closer
- Meeting/Reuniting with the One
- Maintaining a high physical and combat fitness (aka toning up my built as well as improving my IPPT and SOC timings)
- Peace on Earth
- Peace w God

Help.. I just want my cert back!!! =(

'I Miss You.... Do You Miss Me Too?'

"Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own"

2004-11-27T16:05:00.000+08:00

"Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own" - U2

Tough, you think you’ve got the stuff
Your telling me and everyone
You’re hard enough

You don’t have to put up a fight
You don’t have to always be right
Let me take some of the punches
For you tonight

Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don’t have to go it along

And it’s you when I look in the mirror
And it’s you when I don’t pick up the phone
Sometimes you can’t make it on your own

We fight all the time
You and I, that’s alright
We’re the same soul
I don’t need, I don’t need to hear you say
That if we weren’t so alike
You’d like me a whole lot more

Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don’t have to go it alone

And it’s you when I look in the mirror
And it’s you when I don’t pick up the phone
Sometimes you can’t make it on your own

I know that we don’t talk
I'm sick of it all
Can you hear me when I sing
You’re the reason I sing
You’re the reason why the opera is in me

Well hey now
Still got to let you know
A house doesn’t make a home
Don’t leave me here alone

And it’s you when I look in the mirror
And it’s you that makes it hard to let go
Sometimes you can’t make it on your own
Sometimes you can’t make it
Best you can do is to fake it
Sometimes you can’t make it on your own

One of my fav tracks from U2's latest album 'How to dismantle an atomic bomb'... beginning to appreciate the album and admit to why Bono said that this is the all-time best album they did so far.. U2 rocks...

Just got back from my cousin's church wedding.. was counting that this is the 3rd wedding of the month for me.. the 1st one which i failed to attend, last week's one of my OCs and today my cousin.. plus from my other friends whom are also talking abt attending wedding, i think Nov's the month of the year to settle down man.. my parents got married in Nov as well.. what's with Nov? Hmmm.. will always remain a mystery.. might just be a 'tradition'... next time i also get married in Nov then.. heh heh... wondering when's that man...

Later...

As Soon as Forever is Thru, I'll be over You...

2004-11-25T18:01:00.000+08:00

I'll Be Over You - Toto

Some people lives their dreams
Some people close their eyes
Some people's destiny
Passes by

There are no guarantees
There are no alibis
That's how our love must be
Don't ask why

It takes some time
God knows how long
I know that I can forget you

As soon as my heart stops breakin'
Anticipatin'
As soon as forever is through
I'll be over you

Remembering times gone by
Promises we once made
What are the reasons why
Nothin' stays the same

There were the nights
Holdin' you close
Someday I'll try to forget them

As soon as my heart stops breakin'
Anticipatin'
Someday I'll be over you

As soon as my heart stops breakin'
Anticipatin'
Someday I'll be over you

As soon as my heart...

Heard this song at Indochine this evening.. as played by the ever-manificient, failing to dissappoint me, EIC plus this chap by the name of Super Mario... quite meaningful and hopefully I can put my words to actions as per the song...

Just gotten my U2 latest release... must say it's nothing fantastic, though it might take a while to impress me.. unlike previous cd releases, they only have a few songs capable of an instant 'Wow' upon hearing... whatever the case is, U2 still rocks and I look fwd to going 'down under' for their concert come next Oct/Nov/Dec.. Adrian and Weihua, you two better start saving man... =)

Had a resonable day at work the past 2 days.. even could afford some time to fish yesterday @ Punggol.. not much impressive catch.. only 'catch' was discovering this damn 'zai' dating spot... too bad we ain't together, else will bring u over the weekend... the past 2 days were also spent physically maintaining myself... had a good run/gym session with some of my guys.. really miss the NUS days' of gyming with Jerry man... kind of brings back some fond memories...

Went down California Pizza Kitchen for dinner to celebrate Hua's birthday.. left Indochine early cos I was damn shack.. but then again, still can blog now.. heh heh...

Lifted this off my friend's mail 'My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn t value the details of life, not because we didn t love each other any more' I supposed implies same for r/s as well...

'Cos You and I both Loved'...

Me and my iPod!!

2004-11-23T15:10:00.000+08:00

Never thought of blogging on a freaking monday.. but here i am back at home... quite a 'happy' day today.. received my iPod sportsuit to protect my 'baby' since my old case decided to give up on me on sunday.. talk abt efficiency man.. ordered yest and got it today.. free delivery somemore... Apple really got damn dedicated staff, or they are damn free... ha ha ha.. another surprise was getting my CSI Season 2 DVDs.. now I can stay in ALL the way till Friday man.. ha ha ha....

Let's talk abt leadership today shall we? Just faced with a loyalty problem from my PS.. some of my men were playing soccer.. and under the Bn/Coy policy, we ban it becos it's the highest injury creator sport and we don't want our guys to get injure and post a manpower shortage problem.. before i left, told him to stop the guys from playing since he was the one whom allowed them to.. but when i came back later.. yes, to spot-check, the men were still playing.. and he was playing with them somemore.. sigh.. told him off and was quite disappointed after that.. sometimes i wondered, why can't they spare a thought.. how i wish i can allow the men to play.. and how i wish i can afford to give men more freedom.. but then, men will always remain men... even my commanders need to monitor.. but to him, he feel that he's done his job as long as he disseminate the info.. A leader is there to make things happen.. and to ensure things happen.. we enforce standards.. if everyone does things as per told and without being commanded and led.. then why do we need commanders? Proactive or Reactive? I will choose the former...

Narf Said... things aside, can't wait to get my hands on the new U2 cd.. wondering should i spend more to order the collector's edition with a dvd and coffee table book kicked in... tempting tempting..

Going fishing with my boss tmw.. heh heh... hopefully, it's (not) during office hours!! ha ha... talk abt 'ORDing' mood.. think this's the closest we can ever feel towards that...

Later..

Firers, Own Time Own Target, Carry On...

2004-11-22T07:00:00.000+08:00

What a helluva week it has been.. work week might I add.. The usual slacking aka calm before the storm was experienced on the first day back to work.. everyone seems to be still in holiday mood man... pace was slow and everyone seems to be in a daze.. including me... momentum started picking up and 'arrows' started flying after my coy's weekly meeting... hello hello, dear me is in charge of heli ops for our special ops package.. talk abt negotiating with our fellow pilots comrades, arranging for heli-tasking.. blah blah blah... gonna be busy till the year end bawls...

Fell terribly sick on wed and the rest of the week was spent fighting a 'running' nose.. must have been the lack of exercise since last week.. damn, should have went for my morning jog on tuesday.. had a dining-in on wed itself.. saw some own comrades-in-arms since OCS days.. heng no need to compulsory bring dates this time.. else would probably absent myself from the function...

Zeroing range was conducted on Thurs and Fri as part of my Bn's upcoming 4NTM Stand-By as well as ATP range next week.. (dear me 'volunteered' to be the DO on the first day of 'A' coy's Stand-By.. talk abt garang-ness... Narf!) Anyway, for the uninitiated, 4NTM means 4 hours Notice To Movement.. meaning to say, upon activation, we are capable of reaching the 'front lines' of where a conflict would be.. for the peace-loving folks, think of our dear Tekong Robbers more than 1/2 a year back.. the 4NTM CBT Tm was there within that duration.. yes, and my coy has been given the honour to be on 4NTM during Christmas... 'Silent Night, Holy Night... All is Calm.. All is Bright...", hopefully...

Had the whole saturday to myself.. yes, poor me spent it alone... literally for a good part of the morning and afternoon.. yes, i love the new 5-days' work week.. but that was when I was still attached... still reminisence the Sat mornings I send my gf to work following breakfast and fetching her after work for a late lunch and shopping/movies thereafter... damn, got to get bachelorhood into my blood soon...my dear old buddy, Jeff (not very old lah.. know him since May 03 only.. ) whom we share the same birthday..'unfortunately' ha ha.. celebrated his 21st in the evening.. was initially sian abt going, cos really didn't know what to get for him and don't like going empty handed... but finally got him a bottle of red wine and made my way there after church... talk abt fine wine and dine... think gone are the days i was fascinated with booze.. think wine's the way to go now.. won't get beer belly also mah.. anyway, the most touching thing was when he thanked his mom for the 17 years of single-handedly bringing up of him and his bro, after his dad passed away when he was 4.. his mom is truly one of the more happening and impressive mom I ever came across (she still remembers my name though we haven't seen each other for more than half a year).. Aunty, you the woMAN...

Seems to have improved tremedously in my blading skills, though it's been a week since i lasted bladed.. but seems to be getting more comfortable to pick up speed... as well as keep my head up (to bio cai and traffic that is.. the latter being more important of course.. ha ha) gonna help out with one of Bn's OC's wedding soon.. sword bearer that is.. long time since I worn my No. 1.. hope I still look good in them.. wonder when will my turn comes to wear it down the aisle.. with my beautiful bride of course.. dream dream dream...

Was thinking back of a couple of military movies that I liked in the past.. some quotes are really meaningful.. here are some I can think of, for now...

"What you do in life, Echoes in Eternity" - Maximus (just prior to him leading the calvary charge @ the start of the movie), Gladiator

"Hold the line, Stay with me" - Maximus (when he led the charge agst the barbarians @ the start of the movie), Gladiator (used to use this when doing Fire and Movement with my platoon)

"All of my life I have lived by a code and the code is simple: honor the gods, love your woman and defend your country. Troy is mother to us all. Fight for her!" - Hector (when the Greeks landed on their shores), Troy

"Nobody asks to be a Hero, it just sometimes turns out that way" - Eversmann (@ the end of the movie while mourning one of his men's death), Black Hawk Down

"I will leave no one behind. Dead, or alive, we will all come home together." -Moore (in his departing speech to his men before they left for Vietnam), We Were Soldiers

"We Few, We Happy Few, We Band of Brothers" - Lipton (when remembering the events during the World War 2 campaign), Band of Brothers

"I wasn't a Hero, but I serve in a Company of Heros" - Winters (when questioned by his grandson if he was a hero in WW2), Band of Brothers

Till then.. Cowabunga!!!

Love, will keep us alive...

2004-11-16T10:32:00.000+08:00

"There must be a reason why a relationship lasted so long in the first place.
if we can constantly remind ourselves of why we love that person in the first place,
we are on our way to keeping the love alive.

Beyond the silly fights, the diamond rings, the dinner dates,
just like the Heart of Worship, i believe, if, when all is stripped away,
you can still see WHY you chose this person in the first place, that, is love."

- Lifted off a Blog of someone else...

24 and counting...

2004-11-11T03:05:00.000+08:00

Finally, it's my birthday today... doesn't really feel like one, except that some friends' wishes made me realise that I still mean something to them.. Thanks dudes and dudettes... meant a lot to me... Well.. shall keep my this entry short.. 1 year older might just make myself 1 year wiser.. was talking to a long time pal when we came abt how to maintain a relationship when it starts getting stale.. he said, "Just remember the first time when/how/why both of you fell in love with each other.." that would probably save your relationship... might had if I used it on mine perhaps? What wishful thinking...

To those currently facing a relationship crisis.. u might want to try the above advice...

Later...

Blading and all the other jazzs

2004-11-08T21:00:00.000+08:00

In a bid to be SUPER occupied to take my mind off matters.. plus since I'm on leave... decided to engage myself in a new sport.. Inline skating (not forgetting the chances to meet up with new babes as well.. crap..) In order to place my commitment, yours truly has once again, repaid back to the economy by getting myself a brand new set of blades and guards... (and I've not even bladed, once).. Damn, where's my finance minister when I needed her... wait wait wait.. before all gets too hyped up with my splurging as of now, I got a freaking 800 bucks overseas allowance from my overseas trg, so pls let me pamper myself a bit can? Gonna start getting skating lessons from Adrian starting today.. got 1 week to crash trg and we'll see if I can start making it a weekly regime or something..

Freaking many things I want to/need to/must do man..

Diving (completing my DM.. I only left 20 dives!!! But hadn't touched water since May.. last year)
Completing my CSI Season 1 collection (to move on to the rest of the other seasons)
Getting my hands on U2's latest album (out 23rd Nov)
Getting my hands on U2's Digital Music Box (from iTunes... only problem is, the music store is not available to us due to some copyright issues.. gimme a break man and legalise it..)
Photograph Collage for my unit's Armour Road Relay Team (we got the champions this year and my CO wants to have a photo collage done to present to every team member.. idiotic me volunteered.. talk abt having time in hand)
Planning for remedial training for my guys (poor men have to come back on tuesday and friday for RT cos they fail their SOC)
Power up my old PC (obselete since May last year), to transfer all my stuff to my Macs
Get the new G5 iMac with the 20 inch monitor (another splurging buy that's easier to control since I can't afford it yet)
Waiting for the new G5 Powerbook to arrive (yet another...)
Re-deco my room (apparently my dad allocated a budget for that.. wonder if I can do something abt it.. heh heh)
Learn to blade (no no, i got the new blades to collect dust @ home.. duh!)
Be closer to God (realised that I'm drifting away...)
Finish reading the loads of mags I bought from Aust.. (mostly Mac and Military related) got a cookbook too... might start dishing it out, who wants to volunteer to taste? pls be insured first..
Improving on my fitness... must start a fitness regime with running, swimming, gyming incorporated in... Blading is just recre and babe-watching only...
Paying my bills... (not something I want to.. a bit need to.. definitely must)
Getting married by 28...
Waiting still...
Slacking...
......... more to come, akan datang...

Yawn.. For now.. hitting back to my bed... Yes, It's 5am in the morning.. Freaking woke up @ 3am and been dazing in front of the monitor since...